My 21st

I have no idea why I am still keeping this blog.. Well, there's no followers at all though. Throughout the 4 years in Melbourne, I have just too many life experiences. No matter in love, friendship or family. Seems like having a roller coaster every years. By next year august I am going to complete my degree in Melbourne. I wonder what I had done during this few years. I am 21st this year, and I have a boyfriend. But, do I really love him? He seems like a... nobody for me, to be honest. He does not seem the right guy for me either. But, I seem like have to stay with him for a reason.

Oh well, I love the previous guy. The guy who took the all of me, the guy for give me the excitement of life, the guy who made me cry all night, the guy I would love to be with him no matter what's happen. I loved him so much, unfortunately, we can't stay together. And he hurt me so deeply before I get off from this relationship.

I have always thought that friendship will be the second in my life, the first, of course is my family. I got abandoned and ignorance from friends. I wonder if this is my issue to made what had happened in this minute. I judged myself. What is called friend? How does friend keep the relationship with each others? And so, so, so... Just, a million of question marks over my head, spinning around. It's a torture for me indeed. Pey Wei Yeong, I have lost you. But I know you wouldn't care. Yes, you wouldn't because it is your personality. Thank you so much for teaching me how bloody cold you can be. It is really the first time I heard from my besties told me that she wouldn't contact her friend but if you want, you may contact her to ask her out. She was just being too busy to ask someone she feels they might push her away but not with a friend that granted will stay with her. Am I asking for too much or I just need to accept her personality? What would I get in the last then. Lol. Funny...

I can finally read trough what is life. Life is abut money and money... If you have, whoever will treat you go no matter is a good person or bad person.  If you don't have money, then it will be very hard for you to look for a sincere friend because they are only loyal to your money before you. Unless you are looking for the same level kind of friend. Oh well, you will still get abandon due to she wants to look for a 'better quality' friend than you.

Emeia Wong~~ Lol of the Lol. She is brilliant! I must say, if you want to know how fake a person could be? She is one of the billion! I must started to act cuteness and innocent in order to get the attention from the friends. I know I am such a cool type of person. Yes, I am. Hence, I should be humble and learn from her.

I shouldn't complaint about anything over here. It's not the matter of what. I should just learn from them, because this is a pathway of reality. I am still like a little girl living in my princess castle. Sigh.. When will I grow up? When can I be as professional as them? I need some help~~ :X